I MOVED!

Hey. So. I got a new computer. And I can do fancy things on it. And I plan on taking advantage of that!

So, if you'd like, visit me at kidintheelevator.tk!

See ya there...

Update!

So I'm a high school graduate.

psh. I got a diploma and everything.

The whole affair was rather classy--I definitely didn't belong.

Other updates?

I got a new computer!!! It's fantastic...it doesn't crash on me every three seconds! I have mail so readily available! I can watch videos! and use CDs! (basically I'm living the good life). It was a graduation present from the padres.

I survived outdoor ed--mainly because my group was so fantastic and balls-y or vagina-y (it was all girls) we have vaginas of steel.

I saw Toy Story 3. And I cried like a baby...

I got a gym membership at Equinox....I probably won't work out unless Caitlyn goes with me because I'm gymphobic (or gymnophobic? or is that being afraid of nakedness?)...also fatphobic....conundrum.

I hit a man's car! It was actually the most horrendous thing that's ever happened I feel TERRIBLE! Sorry, mister.

Hmmmmm....what else is going on in my interesting life?

I got a job! Selling knives...so it's not exactly prestigious. Snazzy, though. It sucks that I might have to quit if my insurance doesn't cover me roaming door to door.

Still, Christina, Knife Saleswoman.

It would look SWEET on a business card.

Toodle-oo! Summer awaits...

Last Day of School

Hey, I'm going to Yale.

Cause I got it like that.

I'm incredibly excited but that's going to be another post.

I don't mean to be gross and mushy (but hey, what are blogs for?) but today was the last day of school and I am IN LOVE with the class of 2010.

Not only are these some of the smartest kids to come out of Chadwick, but they are some of the kindest, sweetest, most AMAZING, and talented as well. I'm so proud of everyone--and I'm so honored to call my self a SEN10R.

Of course today and yesterday was a crying fest...I'm emotional. But I'm in such a good place right now. I am SO LUCKY!

Of course now I have to finish taking a Physics final, Calculus AP, and writing a spanish essay...but who's really thinking about that when I have this picture to dwell on:



love you, 2010

London Calling

I just got done meeting some of the sweetest/nicest/sassiest/adorable-est kids from Gordonstoun!

They were basically on a theatre-exchange with our school and they were pretty cool...

I MISS THEM.

Anyway, I'm sad I couldn't get to know them better, but I seriously can't wait to visit Europe: London specifically! I mean the accents, the men, the atmosphere, the men, the accents!

HOW AMAZING WOULD THAT BE?!

Super amazing. Obviously.

Meanwhile, I've realized that I have exactly 4 days left of real school. Which is absolutely cray cray...How is my 13 years up? How is this really the end? It makes NO sense! I also have no idea where I'm going to college next year (but I'm visiting both so hopefully the answer will come to me then)

My life is all too exciting right now! I just can't contain myself! Also I ordered new glasses...I'm gonna look soooo smart.

Tally HO!

Hold up...

It's april...I'm a senior

WHY IN GOD'S NAME DO I HAVE SO MUCH WORK TO DO THIS WEEKEND???

psh, that WOULD be my life.

Updates:

Cute boys from Gordonstoun school are visiting Chadwick*
My body is sore from dancing
HAIR revival tonight
I want a Jamba
Still haven't made a college decision
THE INBETWEENERS is actually fabulous (one of these days I'm gonna have to do a comprehensive post about all tv shows I've watched/seen. I guarantee it will be epic)

My life is surprisingly simple. I'm kinda lovin' it.







**scottish men with accents. and they sing. and act. and are within my clutches!

Banks

I really don't like people who are rude to tellers. I also don't like people who are overly friendly with tellers.

Psh, It's not like you know that persons life...Since when are you guys best friends for life?!

I say this because of some guy who was chatting up the bank teller, thus making me wait for FOREVER in line. `

I hate banks. They stress me out. Hence the Jamba in my hand**.

Anyway, Godot is waiting (BA-DUM CHING!) and I have decisions to make.

Peace.



**this isn't technically an addiction, right?

Nigerian Wedding!

A quick break from the college type posts (blah, boring)

My cousin got married yesterday!!!

It was a traditional Nigerian wedding, meaning traditional dress, meaning I looked like this:

Awesome right?!

Anyway the wedding consisted of several ceremonial type things. Like they would bring out girls and the bride's dad (my uncle) would ask, "Is this the beautiful flower you saw in my house?" And the groom would be all, "she's cool....but that's not her!!" And then they would negotiate how much money the groom should pay to see a different girl (in the hopes that it's his bride) and then when they finally brought out my cousin, he had to pay just to peek behind the veil.

It was all very interesting, and very comedic--it was totally informal: people would yell out for him to pay more and stuff.

Well once he finally figured out who his bride was, there was a bunch of exchanging of stuff. Like the bitter kola, kola nut, horsepepper (each symbolizing different phases of the marriage). And then there was the exchange of gifts and the drinking of the pure water...there was just a lot going on. It was all VERY theatrical.

And I had a lot of fun considering that the whole thing was in either french, ibo, or some sort of pidgin English. Nigerian accents are strong.

Meanwhile, my "cousins" (you know the type who aren't really related to you but your families are intermarried) didn't know that we were cousins and so were apparently going on about me in french, only to flip a shit after realizing we're family. They were about ready to buy me (meaning marry me...but still that's not much better) according to my oldest cousin.

That's so weirdly and incestuously flattering.

In any case, today will be wedding part deux--church wedding. So I'm hoping to dodge some cousins and have a good time convincing the rest of the family that I will in fact NOT be the next one to get married.

Wish me luck!

OH SNAP!

Did y'all know I used to have another blog??

I never updated it...probably because I was too busy watching tv--I mean, applying to college.

Enjoy!

College

Hey!

So I have a great and wonderful problem...

I got into every college I applied to.

Which, admittedly is pretty amazing--so *toot toot* on my horn, but to be fair I only applied to 9 schools whereas most people applied to like 15.

So right now I'm deciding between two amazing schools. TWO FANTASTIC AMAZING SCHOOLS. I'm basically Caitlyn (hey gurl hey)**

Actually I'm deciding between three...but right now my mind is just totally zoned in on:

or

Again, I'm totally thankful. Seriously, Jesus, I don't know what I did to deserve this but thanks! I'm totally scared shitless though, I mean, what if I can't cut it in either atmosphere? I mean, seriously these are the geniuses of the nation--and anyone who knows me KNOWS that genius I am NOT. I'm smart, and pretty up on my pop culture references--verbal sparring skills are pretty decent but honestly,

yale? stanford? NO.

If I didn't have a jamba right now, I'd be having a full scale panic attack.

Not to mention my cousin is getting married today and it's going to be a full scale nigerian fiesta. And I have to wear traditional dress (aka shoot me now)

I see many pro-con lists in my future.

I'm happy. I feel like this song

I'll be fine. I'm good. I'm good.

oy vey.





**is it not creepy that my life and your life are the same?

I Heart Fatties!

So I was watching the Tyra show today...

yeah, shame on me.

Anyway it was one of her 'undercover' investigations or whatever...except this time on obesity!! Those 4 readers of mine (what's up guys?) might already know that I'm obsessed with obesity. Or maybe they don't know that I'm obsessed.

But I kinda am.

And what's worse is that I like to watch things about obesity as I'm eating. I feel like it cancels out or something--which, makes NO sense!

Anyway, she went into the idea of fat discrimination being the last form of 'suitable' discrimination. And it got me thinking (God job, Tyra!) that she is totally right. And what's worse, the people she had on her show were these TERRIBLE completely ignorant women who just went on and on about how obese people or just fat people were disgusting/gross. I was SHAKING I was so angry. I mean, I know a couple people at school who say mean things about fat people...or rather make gross assumptions about all fat people...but none of them have the gall...or rather all of them have the SENSE to keep it to themselves.

Seriously, when did it become okay to be rude, just because you think fat people are ugly?

And for the record--I don't think fat people are ugly!! I mean...how on earth can you generalize about a whole group of people? And seriously where are we drawing the line at fat?? Is it like 200 pounds? Is it like 20 pounds overweight (can I get a what-what?)? Or is it just...I don't know whatever you feel like?

Anyway, the point is...people make me angry! And I celebrated my anger with a jamba juice and a gingeroo (legitimately the tastiest cookie ever)!

Besides general anger though, the show sort of opened me up to the idea of a new career choice. You know I always thought I'd study psychology in college...but then I'd just become a lawyer or something like that afterwards. What if I actually kept studying psych and then became some sort of body image specialist who went around telling women to love their bodies!?

Cool, right?

I'd be all, "hey world, love me" and then I'd like roast a chicken in the flames from my burning bra...

I don't know how this post ended up here...

whatever,
Fatty out

LIFE PWN

So one of my best friends, Caitlyn Calfas just got into Stanford.

Which I'm PEEING WITH JOY about. And Austen got into USF which means...we could all end up in the bay area next year. Fabulous.

And like, what's weird is we were JUST having a classy gf power hour at Yellow Vase the other day, talking about college and our lives.

i was literally in a TERRIBLE mood the past few days...and then it's slowly just gotten better and better and better...and i feel like...my life is sooooo OPEN so free! you know? like, i can do anything!!!!

Some realizations I've had concerning my awesome life:

YOU LIVE IN SAN PEDRO (or near enough to it that you can bask in the awesomeness)
Why would I care about what he thinks??
You got into college....you got into like....fucking 5 colleges....you got a full ride to USC...you are smart!
YOUR ROOM IS CLEAN, FINALLY CLEAN
Spring break 2010 is well needed rest
You aren't crazy!!!

I mean...of course there are some things that I'd still like to happen (like, figuring out how the hell I'm gonna pay for college???) but overall

LIFE BE GOOD.

and if you didn't believe how good it is from this post...you should know i'm sippin' on some JAMBA as i write this...BOOYAH!

Sooo

My life isn't all about men. Or thinking about them....I just realized my last few posts were about them....which is...a coincidence.....soooo


yeah.



here's my favorite song right now: Flagpole Sitta



***added later...like 2 minutes later...i was NOT aware of the masturbation reference...but carry on***

Right Now

Yeaaaaah, I haven't updated in a while.....I suck that way.

I have so much dishy stuff that I want to spill, but all of it is related to my crazy musical kids in the elevator friend type people so there really isn't anyone TO tell. Meh, I have so much work to do!! This is why I haven't been updating. I mean, I have work to do yet I'm here typing this.

Procrastination wins errrtime.

I want to say so much but I have an irrational fear of people finding this blog and using my secrets against me...like what if I were to post my year(s) long crush on....OH SNAP

yeah, I was never gonna say.

On a related note, men suck. Like, why can't they get over themselves and just be into hooking up? Like, we're in high school (for the time being WHATUP) do we really need these intense relationships? Why make everything a big deal. Why do men/women relations have to be this crazy dance of pomp and circumstance?? Girls just wanna have fun--

Ugh....I'm just saying this cause I can't admit to myself that this guy doesn't want me. fml. And why did this post get bogarted men?

Oh yeah, I suck.

Well I guess that brings this post full circle.

Alisha OUT! (that's my code name for secret missions and shit)

Things that I Hate

Men. All of them. Pick one, I hate him.

on a separate note: http://blog.kiamatthews.com

she's fantastic.

Valentine's Day

This day would've sucked were it not for the amazing people that were in my house this morning...and the ridiculously good looking guy who wished me a happy valentine's day at check-out.


oh, yeah, there was something there between us check-out guy...let's not fight it


Happy Valentine's Day indeed.

Secret Secrets are no Fun!

Lately, I feel as though I'm keeping EVERYONE'S secrets. Which, I don't know...that's whatever. But it's sort of hard to pretend like nothing has changed once I see these people around. It's like I want to hug them, punch them, or just stare at them without them knowing why/how I found these things out.

I don't know--maybe I shouldn't complain, I've been in a funk lately.

A funk that was interrupted temporarily by the AMAZINGNESS of last night's formal! But actually, it was the best senior formal a girl could ask for!

But the more time I spend in this 'funk' the more I realize I need a change of setting--a fresh start! And I'm sad that I'll have to wait till college to get it.


I suppose I'll just keep on trucking until then.

People Suck Sometimes

I am amazed at how quickly one can go from happy to sad.

life is funny that way...

I was betrayed this evening by two people who I thought had my back...but it turns out they don't. Which, (as was pointed out to me multiple times by these people) is of course my fault. I wonder if that refers to my fault for trusting them or for just being so presumptuous that I could even believe that they were actually my friends.

Call me stupid, call me dramatic--but why do people who KNOW you're upset pretend like you're an idiot for being upset? I honestly don't get it? Are they stupid? I don't know. I don't care. But that to me is one of the lowest things a person can do, is just completely disregard your feelings because they think you shouldn't feel a certain way.

WELL FUCK THAT


on a completely related note: HOORAY FOR PEOPLE WHO GET SHITFACED AT MAMMOTH AND THEN SPREAD RUMORS ABOUT YOU!

Snapshot: Pros/Cons

Pros:

1. I'm a second semester senior
2. I make a bitchin' lasagna!
3. I just finished The Strangers (which isn't due until forever)
4. ...And I did the vocab list!
5. I just discovered Malcolm in the Middle
6. ....And it's awesome
7. Winter formal is in less than a week
8. I'm turning 18 in less than a week
9. I got into college
10. I have an adorable dog
11. Finals? OVER

Cons:

1. In just a few short months, I might not get to see my entire grade ever again
2. I secretly fear my lasagna isn't that good
3. I'm not a 100% sure we had to read The Strangers next
4. ...And I'm bored out of my fucking mind
5. Malcolm in the Middle is NEVER on.
6. ....EVER
7. My formal dress makes me look like a whore...a giant, teal, whore*
8. PRISON! PRISON! PRISON!
9. I can't afford college
10. My dog is DISGUSTING right now, and he kept me up all night, and I have to wash him right now
11. My calc grade will be a joke.



All that said I think this list puts me on top for the moment!



*I'm gonna say that's also a pro...because whores can be fun! Just ask a whore!

Random Update

What is this??? A post....on....my...what the F?!

Yeah, I'm alive (barely). Finals week just passed. I had an interview for "Hahvahd" today. I have nothing to do. So naturally it's the perfect time to blog...

So much time has passed since my last posting.

I got into STANFORD! I'm excited. I also got into USC! It's like the pressure is totally off!* I feel like for the last 13 years all I've done is study, so it's nice that it actually paid off. (And now that I actually think about it, at the beginning of freshman year our class was definitely told by Wieds that none of us were going to get into these sorts of schools...most likely to discourage unhealthy competition and stress...but yeah Wieds, in YO face)**

But in all seriousness, I really can't wait to see the amazing things my classmates end up doing. Or the amazing colleges they'll attend. I honestly believe that I know some of the most intelligent kids in America (or at least in California) And honestly, my friends are some of the coolest kids on the block--but actually. I am seriously going to miss these people.

Which is why I invited a bunch of them to spend the night at my house on the 13th!! Why? Do you ask, oh one reader of this blog? Because I'm turning eighteen. EIGHTfuckingTEEN! I will be a legal adult...doing adult things....like....I have no idea.

NOT looking forward to being charged as an adult! (though...I shouldn't be planning on getting charged with anything)

Anyway, my completely tame 18th birthday "partizzle" (yes, -tizzle) will be spent chilling with the amigos, doing god knows what, the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and other shenanigans. ALSO lasagna! I am obsessed with lasagna (that will be a post eventually).

Note: Now that I've actually written out what will be happening at this shindig, I'm very worried it will suck. Rocky Horror won't suck, but I'm so bad at planning these sorts of things...I don't want people getting bored! And I certainly don't want to have a bunch of girls gathered around the television before going to see a movie/play/debaucherous monstrosity! And really, there is only so much food I can feed them before they get suspicious...do I break out the karaoke? (Is it 1998?)*** I suppose we can tool around on my ANCIENT playstation...which I'm not even sure works properly--or play taboo? oy vey! Rant over.

But I'd say I'm living the good life. My room and my hair is a hot mess, but what can a girl do, really? I guess not much.

Anyways, I'll catch ya' later (in the elevator)

*emphasis on "like"--the pressure is never off
** Wieds. oh you.
*** In my world it's perpetually 1998